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With all the important stuff going on (Pineapple Express, Tropic Thunder), I haven’t written a single thing about The Olympics. As I don’t watch much television anymore, most of my news has been coming from reading news online, which is probably much better for my sleep schedule. A lot of people are losing sleep staying up late watching.

As a red blooded American, I am rooting wholeheartedly for USA in everything, whether or not they are expected to be medal contenders. Unlike some of my friends, there is no sentiment of consolation if China, the country of of my ethnic background, is the one beating American to the medals.

Still, I am very impressed with what China has done with their Olympic program. They are set to be the dominant country in the next two or three Olympics. I’m sure they run a strict program, and I wouldn’t want to be this guy. Keep on eye on him. It might be the last time you ever see him again. You don’t bring shame to your nation and live to tell about it.

Other than the redemption of men’s basketball, the events I am following most closely are the swimming events. I am also paying attention to one particular athlete, Michael Phelps. There’s something about a man in a Speedo We all know the story of his pursuit to become the greatest Olympian of all time by grabbing eight gold medals. The man is a machine. He is 6′4″, consumes over 10,000 calories a day, and he can’t break 200lbs. I’d love to be on that diet. I guess it is the fuel he needs to kick ass.

My favorite Phelps victory thus far was the 4×100 Free Relay, where we beat France after they claimed, “The Americans? We will smash them.” What did we learn, France? Don’t even bother shaving your pits for the swimming pool. Tell your women to do it instead.