Moron Enterprises

All of you have heard of The Offspring. Even if you’re not into the genre of music, I’m pretty sure you’ve heard the song, Pretty Fly for a White Guy. Their lead singer is known as Dexter Holland. He is known for his characteristically unique vocals. He earned the nickname for being incredibly smart, and his track record proves it. He was valedictorian of his high school. He received a Bachelor’s degree in biology and a Master’s degree in molecular biology, both from USC. He declined the pursuit of a PhD in order to work with his band. How awesome is that?

To top it off, the guy has his own hot sauce line. It’s kind of a strange business to get into, especially since there are thousands of hot sauces to choose from on the shelves. You can try Gringo Bandito at any Wahoo’s Fish Taco or you can buy it at Albertsons. I love how all the testimonials are from rock stars.

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Take that, you doubters! First I sang my way to a 99% score on Radiohead’s Creep. Then I played drums and sang to the same song without getting booed off the stage. Finally, Michelle and I accomplished what everyone told us would be impossible. We beat a song on medium level in Rock Band. Despite overwhelming odds against us (Michelle hurt her hand drumming), we triumphed in the rock star arena. I feel like I could play an actual instrument on stage in front of thousands of people, but then I remember this is just a video game. Believing that I am a true rock star is as much of a twisted dream as people that play World of Warcraft thinking they can be part of an army of mythical creatures, roaming virtual worlds.

Still, I have a new found love for Rock Band. Despite the awkwardness of not being like the real instruments, it’s a game that pumps you up so much that it’s really recommended that you don’t play within thirty minutes of your bed time. Showers are also recommended after intense rock sessions. With some practice my skills will increase, and I will say to all those people who doubt me, “Whatever, man. I’ll kick your ass…online.”

You can soon grab the entire Beatles’ back catalog on iTunes. The deal has been made between Apple Computer and Apple Corps, the Beatles’ corporation that manages their music catalog. Paul McCartney will receive 400 million dollars out of this deal. I’d wager he is still receiving royalties on top of that initial sum. He needs the cash, because a portion of that is going to that bitch, Heather Mills, as their divorce settlement continues. Although dollar amounts are not mentioned, I’m sure Ringo and the estates of the other Beatles made out like bandits too.

I believe they completely deserve every cent they get. They revolutionized music, and no one does their music justice but them. I hope this will spread their music to a wider audience, because I’m tired of hearing the crap that is on the airwaves as of late.

How many times have you thought to yourself, “I really want to sing, but I can hardly remember the lyrics to any song, and where am I going to find a karaoke bar open at 5:00 AM?” I know it’s a common thought for myself, and I’m sure it’s a concern that weighs on your minds constantly. Worry no more, my friends.

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I picked up some new music this weekend and I thought I’d share my thoughts on these albums.

Smashing Pumpkin’s new album, Zeitgeist, is one of the albums I picked up. “Smashing Pumpkins’ first CD in 7 years” was written on the packaging, and you know what? It’s about time. If you like The Smashing Pumpkins, you will like this album. The familiar distortion that is The Smashing Pumpkins’ signature sound comes through in many of the tracks. Also, in typical Pumpkins fashion the guitar levels are turned up way high and the vocals come in as almost background tracks in many of the tracks. This album is good but definitely not ground breaking. If you’re a fan of Billy Corgan’s work with The Smashing Pumpkins, it’s worth a listen just to hear some new stuff.

Another album I picked up is Hot Hot Heat’s latest album, Happiness Ltd. I have heard this album previously through a friend that works in the music industry. He has had a copy of this album for quite a while and only let me hear it. I couldn’t get a copy of it, because it was watermarked. I’ve been waiting for this album to appear on store shelves for quite a while. This album is great. While it showcases the same whiney vocals that Hot Hot Heat fans are so familiar with, it is much more mellow than their last release. I believe it will probably be enjoyed and accepted more so by the masses more. This is an album I recommend you guys pick up.

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I have head a few tunes stuck in my head for a while now, but unlike the song from FAO Schwartz, I am not ready to tear my hair out. Take a listen to the songs if you can get your hands on them.

The Vines - The Factory. I love the bass in this song.
Brand New - The Quiet Things That No One Ever Knows
The Strokes - Automatic Stop
Muse - Starlight

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I picked up The Fratellis’ album Costello Music after seeing the iPod ads. The Fratellis remind me slightly of The Strokes, but much less aloof in their music presence. I don’t know exactly how to classify this album. I would have to call it Swing Rock. The description makes it sound like multiple styles of music thrown together haphazardly, but the album is well put together. It has a bright, upbeat sound. The album definitely makes you want to wear and iPod, be a black silhouette, and dance around like a maniac on a brightly colored background. That Steve Jobs sure knows how to make music players and downloadable music interesting.

The Vines’ Vision Valley is an album I first heard while playing Wii Bowling at Barrington. We turned on a black light and put on this CD and it was like Rock n’ Bowl. When The tunes stuck in my head and I picked it up two days later. What can I say about the sound of this album? When The Vines first came onto the scene, I called them The Beatles But With More Rock. This album holds up to that sound, a great compilation, well balanced with fast rhythms as well as slower rock ballads. The only down side to this album is that it is very short. One way of a trip to work lets me play this album through once completely and halfway through again.

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This week I picked up Brand New’s latest album. To clear up the confusion for those of you that don’t know, the band’s name is Brand New and the album is also brand new. I’ve listened through this album a few times, and I have to say that I like it. The title of the album, The Devil and God Are Raging Inside Me, is quite fitting. The songs sound like the voice of a tortured soul, torn between good and evil. The lyrics are a vivid depiction of the writer’s internal struggle and his apparent descent into darkness. It’s an album that’s great as background music when working, but it’s also great get into it and hear the story unfold. Brand New has done a great job putting together another awesme album.

I have had so much work thrown on me recently. Really, I didn’t have much choice but to work through the weekend. I put in another sixteen hours this weekend, and I am almost caught up with all my work. Although there was a lot of work to be done, it was a great weekend.

Saturday night, Tony got the privilege of being a judge in the Global Battle of the Bands, hosted at Key Club. He got a bunch of us onto the guest list. Harrison was in town and he and Annie came out. It was nice to get back to the small clubs on The Sunset Strip, where I saw countless concerts back in college. What can I say about the music? Some of the bands were great, while others had no place in the contest. I think the judges had it hard, because the bands weren’t even the same genre of music.

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My Chemical Romance has released its latest album, The Black Parade, and let me just say this is a breath of fresh air compared compared to the pop sounds of Panic at the Disco or Fall Out Boy. Music has been pretty stagnant lately. When you have all radio stations playing the same songs, there is definitely a lack of creativity. So, what’s so great about this new album? Well, my personal opinion is that My Chemical Romance has taken their goth rock style and created a rock ballad album. This album is well pieced together. It’s great for background music, and it’s even better when you want to just rock out to some well produced tunes. I’m not completely thrilled with the way the tracks were ordered on this album, but I still have much listening to do. I would still recommend this album for anyone looking for some new music.