Moron Enterprises

There are some things going on with Michelle and myself currently, relationship issues. She denies it, but I think it resulted in the poking of my eye in the middle of the night. Fortunately, like most people, I sleep with my eyes closed, but damn that hurt. Yes, the violence continues. She says things are fine, but yet I keep getting attacked. I must have made her so mad that she’s buried it in her subconscious, and it manifests itself in half conscious aggression.

I think this all stems from the fact that Michelle hasn’t completely gotten over one of her loves. She is having a love affair with pho. It’s quite obvious that she is thinking of pho when she is with me. I even found the local pho restaurant hidden in her phone, filed simply under the letter P. Her Facebook profile picture is of her, eating pho. It doesn’t matter if she’s had pho twice during the week. She can’t get enough. I think professional counseling is in order for us to work out our food differences.

I stumbled across this old picture of Michelle and me and decided to scan  it and share it with the rest of you. Ignore the date on it. The day was July 4, 1998. You can see a neighborhood block party in the background. Some things to note are how skinny I am and the fact that I am taller than Michelle, despite standing on a lower portion of the street. She must have grown an extra inch or two during college. Look how happy and care free we were then.

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Michelle: You need to be nicer to me.
Me: Come on! I’m sick!
Michelle: You were sick all last week already.
Me: What? I used up all my sick days?
Michelle: Yes.

I wonder if I can save them up and roll them over to next year if I don’t use them, or maybe I can just cash them out at the end of the year. Also, am I allowed to call in sick when we’re invited somewhere together and then stay home and play video games?